We got back from the big trip three days ago and it’s taken us until now to wrap our heads around the past week enough so that we can write up a post.

To fill out what Peter obliquely mentioned in his Aug. 16 post, Jon got accepted into the Discovery program at the Easter Seals Merrywood camp near Ottawa earlier this year. This is a 5-day session for camp newbies (as opposed to the regular 10-day session), and the upper age limit was 12, so we figured that this year was now or never for Jon!

We were a bit trepidatious about sending Jon off on his own, and we certainly did our share of over-thinking the whole thing, which probably describes our whole life with Jon for the past 13 years. We’ve pretty much had to chart our own course with Jon, since no one else—not even health professionals—ever got a full handle on the scope and interactions of Jon’s challenges. But after 13 years of having never been away from Mom and Dad, it was time to start snipping away those apron strings.

Of course, when we saw the photo on the flyer postcard we received late last year it threw us for a loop for a bit:

All this talk about cutting strings suddenly makes us nervous…

Since we had been told by friends and neighbours—very firmly—not to come back home for the camp duration, but to have a real vacation, we decided to explore Montreal and Quebec City; cities far enough away from Jon and yet near enough for our comfort.

Sunday, Day 1

Camp Merrywood gates

We said goodbye to a glum Photon Sunday morning (a big thanks to friend David for house/dogsitting). Jon was in high spirits during the 5-hour drive to the camp. A new audiobook (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory—a favourite), a lunch stop at Swiss Chalet in Kingston, and even the family winning the top prize in our iPod version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire added up to a chipper Jon. Once at camp, the staff took us around for a tour of the facilities, which looked very satisfactory to us. The campers’ sleeping quarters are 3 air-conditioned buildings, each of which has 4 beds per room and two rooms each of boys and girls. When it came time for goodbyes, Jon suddenly became, not sad; very serious and sober. Grave. Which pulled considerably on the parental heartstrings!

Craft Hall at left; Meal Hall in centre; Jon’s “cabin” at right

By the time we got to Montreal we didn’t have a lot of time to do much more than check into our room (Hôtel du fort), take the Métro to wander around the rue St-Denis area and eat at Chez Doval, a homey Portugese restaurant. Food wasn’t fancy, but boy was it good! Peter had a grilled squid appetizer and red snapper; Laura had a roasted quail appetizer and a seafood casserole that contained the largest mound of lobster, clams, mussels, etc. on tomatoes and rice either of us had ever seen! No room for dessert.

Monday, Day 2

Checked out of hotel, picked up some bagels and lox from Fairmount‘s and headed out to Quebec City via the (so we were told) more scenic North route. It was okay, nothing special, except for a random exit from the highway to find a picnic spot, ending up at the little town Sainte-Geneviève-de-Batiscan for a very picturesque lunch.

(Mind you, the GPS got decidedly psychotic about the unscheduled pit stop!)

The spot where we ate lunch

Panorama of Batiscan river. Larger version

We got into Quebec City mid-afternoon, where we settled into our hotel, the charming Auberge de la place d’armes, right on rue Ste-Anne smack in the middle of Old Quebec. Our room was cozy and clean, with hand-made, slightly funky furniture, decent amenities (free wireless internet) and, unfortunately, a very noisy but working air conditioner. (The hotelier profusely apologized about the noise; it had broken the day before and although they called a repairman, so had everyone else with problems in this first big summer heatwave.)

We ate dinner at the hotel’s restaurant, Pain Béni, expecting a touristy French bistro. Instead we were pleasantly surprised to discover delightful, imaginative food. We actually ate dinner at Pain Béni both nights we were there, as well as both breakfasts (included in the hotel price), and all were excellent. (There are other good restaurants in Québec, but none we found in our wanderings. All the other restaurants we came upon catered to white-bread tastes: lots of beef, spaghetti, and when a posted menu read “hamburgeois”, we kept on walking…)

An half-eaten example of the imaginative desserts at Pain Béni: Olive-oil ice-cream with scoop of grapefruit granita, pralined pine-nuts, drizzled with a balsamic vinegar syrup. Yum!

At the end of the day we wandered around the lower city, trying unsuccessfully to find where the Robert Lepage projection show was being shown. We figured the show was cancelled due to the thunderstorms that evening.

Tuesday, Day 3

Upon reading the tourist information in our hotel room we found out that the Lepage installation runs every day during the summer, rain or shine—except on Mondays and Tuesdays. Dang. But what a show it seems to be, projected on 80 grain silos in the harbour, the size of 25 IMAX screens.

Off to tour the Citadelle, where we watched the changing of the guard, petted the regimental goat, and generally roasted in the heat (though with the humidity so high it was probably more a slow braise.)

Batisse, the regimental goat during the changing of the guard—how veddy British

Batisse’s golden horns. Peter’s thinking of getting his ears done this way.

Lots of walking around various streets of Quebec, eating lots of gelato, buying chocolate, and generally doing the tourist thing.

View of the St. Lawrence River from the Citadelle. Larger version

Wednesday, Day 4

After check-out we decided to take a side-trip to Baie-St-Paul to wander, enjoy the little artist community and see an exhibit of costumes from Cirque du Soleil at the Musée d’art contemporain (B-S-P is where Cirque got its start).

Finally, a highway with some pretty countryside! Lovely rolling farmland inscribed by long thin rectangles, and steeper, wooded hills heading 3/4 km above sea level.

Rolling hills on the way to Baie-St-Paul

Nice costume exhibit, some lunch at a local bistro and back to Montreal via the snore-inducing South route.

Our room at the Hôtel du fort was upgraded to a suite and free wireless; we suspect that they over-booked. Dinner was at l’Éxpress, another French bistro, but this one a superlative one. We had previously made reservations, which is de rigueur because the place was packed to the gills on a Wednesday night. People were still waiting at the bar for tables at 10:45 at night. (BTW, thanks to Marie-Louise for both of our Montréal restaurant recommendations!)

Thursday, Day 5

Check-out and off to the Musée de beaux-arts to see the Frédéric Back exhibit. Loaded up on more bagels, chocolatines and croissants aux amandes, then off to Ann and David’s in Ottawa for another scrumptious French-influenced dinner (a lovely duck confit), with Kevin and Heawon and Clay and Taeyun joining us. The interests of our friends and relations gelled so perfectly that while they chatted, Laura and I secretly joked about heading back to T.O. a day early! Thanks so much to Ann and David for their hospitality, food and lodgings too!

Friday, Pick up

Jon and his camp counsellors

Up early to pick up Jon from camp. Jon was very pleased to see us (BIG hugs), but was clearly happy as a clam at camp. On the car trip home he alternately watched his DVDs and listened to Chocolate Factory, but was even chattier than usual, talking very excitedly and loudly about anything and everything: TV shows, camp activities, lunch, DVDs, etc.; he was absolutely bubbling over with excitement.

What Jon looked like most of the way home

On his “Camper Experience Form” the counsellors noted that Jon was an enthusiastic participant in all the camp activities, co-operative and friendly, “and has a fantastic smile.” The fact that camp agreed so well with Jon is a HUGE relief to us. The first apron strings have been successfully cut, and this is maybe a good sign of future steps to independence. At the very least, it’s looking great for another (10-day) session at Camp Merrywood next summer.

We haven’t gone to great lengths to tell everyone until now, but now the anticipation and planning is done: the week to come is going to be a huge change for all three of us.

Earlier this spring, Jon was accepted to a special-needs residential camp for this coming week. As in a full-blown overnight camp for kids with disabilities. Far away from home.

It will be the first time that Jon will spend a night without at least one of us since he left the hospital he was born in. One of us has always been there, through hospital troubles and similar brief moments.

A nearby neighbour (a child psychologist) got wind of this, and made a simple demand of us: not to return home for 5 days. Don’t just go home and play house that week; go have our own adventure. From there, a number of friends, neighbours and dog-park colleagues helped hone our destinations by making all sorts of suggestions.

To add to the complexity our contractor is going to tear apart our upstairs bathroom and begin the refit to make it accessible for a boy rapidly turning into a man. So we’ve been trying to deal with a number of plotlines, as it were, as they converge. Tomorrow.

I can’t tell you how we’ll react to being without Jon, nor how he’ll react to being without us. I imagine there will be many emotions on both sides. The connection—and for us the sense of responsibility—is so strong, so ingrained. In the last couple of days, Jon has had many moments of quiet thought, his face quite serious. He’s starting to realize that at camp he won’t have his computer, his beloved iPod, his Wii or his DVDs. Or his parents.

As for us, what did we do before we served his needs? 😉

So, off we go. If we find internet access, maybe we’ll report in by Twitter, so watch our Twitter feeds on the sidebar!